The Endurance of a Fairy

She is magic personified; a God sent fairy who is not native to a fairy tale but to the earth. She is……..Woman.

The writer and Sutradhar of the greatest epic ever, ‘Life’ swirls his magic wand, creates fairies and sends them on Earth to do what he cannot, being the writer and Sutradhar. These fairies have the magical power of endurance beyond imagination. This power is bestowed upon both the genders but Women have a supernatural kind of endurance.

Though the society is changing and becoming better a ‘Girl child’ is still not welcomed in some families and has to struggle, sometimes even for her life….but the society is changing and this little fairy is getting her due. As she grows she has to keep up with the pride of the family, which for some reasons is mostly on the shoulders of girls, while mostly it is the other gender that tarnishes the pride of the family, it is less frequent that a girl tarnishes the pride of her family.

In the second phase of her life he has to endure to carve a niche for herself in this male dominated professional society, where the success of a woman is the cause of concern for most of the members of the opposite gender, less men can tolerate to be sub-ordinate to a woman or even partner in profession, it hurts a certain ‘male ego’…God only knows for what reason they have these egos but they do, that is their congenital problem. But this also is changing, because they have no other option as they can never endure as much as a woman and therefore have to succumb to her.

In the third phase she has to give a test of her endurance once again as she enters the Gruhast Jeevan. Now she has to leave her till now home and acclimatize to new surrounding and people. For men it is easy as they don’t have to disturb their regular setup, for them it just another member in the family but for a woman it is another family. It is not easy to be malleable enough to adjust to a new family; still she endures to do so. In the process of molding herself she has to sacrifice many of her wishes. Only a woman can embrace so many new relationships and nurture them with love and respect. As it is truly said only a woman has the power to transform a house into home. Men can make houses but not homes, women may not be able to make houses but they certainly can make homes.

To enter into the fourth phase, she has to undergo the most grueling endurance of all. All this to deliver a new character created by the Writer. Though the new being is of two individuals the endurance is of one only. In nurturing the child also, the mother undergoes most of the grilling, and she does so with a smile on her face. This is the phase which every woman cherishes and can sacrifice anything for this one feeling….Motherhood.

A woman has a plethora of responsibilities and diverse relations to shoulder. It is not a cakewalk to shoulder so many responsibilities which just keep compounding. In spite of all this she is able to keep her calm and still endure endlessly. Men don’t endure half as much as women do and still can complain of being tired, but women are like the muscles of the heart which just cannot retire.

These God sent fairies undergoes all the endurance with a smile on her face and love in her heart without expecting anything in return…but she does deserve to be addressed with three special words: ‘You are Great’...

Just realized what is love.....

17th August 2009: A sultry extended summer afternoon, She (my protagonist, don’t want to mention the name) is fast asleep, in spite of the loud volume of the Television and the generators running in the neighboring houses. Her family members are chatting their time away in the drawing room, but she prefers to sleep in the innermost room of the house. When everybody is engrossed in deep discussion suddenly she runs through the drawing room. I sat up confused and almost scared, when another person just smiled and said not to worry He (her husband) must be coming, his scooter must be at the turn and within the next two minutes he was parking his scooter.
How the hell on earth did she know that he was just round the corner when we couldn’t hear even our own voices because of the generators running around, this I thought happens only in Karan Johar movies but this time I saw it for real. She really loves him a lot. She knows exactly what time will he come down for his afternoon snacks or evening tea. She loves sleeping, but even in her deepest slumber she will know exactly when he is coming, almost like reflex action.
1 hr later he comes down after freshening up, his eyes glanced across the entire room, everybody was their but he didn’t start eating till she came with his cup of tea (which only she will make, as a rule). As soon as she came he removed a sweet from his plate and gave it to saying “Mujhe nahi Khana”, she doesn’t resist takes it and eats. I asked my aunt that I have been seeing this for about 15 yrs now and this happens without an exception of even one day, then why doesn’t she keep one sweet less in his plate. My aunt smiled and said that, he does it because he knows that she hasn’t had one after lunch. He finishes and she is off to sleep or reading a book, something she loves. They didn’t exchange a word other than “Mujhe nahi Khana” and that’s all that they have spoken since morning is what I came to know. Is this true and deep love…which needs no vector like words.

22nd April 1984: She is all dressed up as a bride and all set to marry him. She is not nervous neither is he. Both of them have known each other for over 14 yrs now (that’s on records, and may be a few more years for which there is no authenticated record).

Sitting on the dais, waiting for his bride he recalls the first day he had met her, as his junior in Medical College. Now, he is about to tie the knot with the woman he always wanted to spend his life (though they are opposite to each other in every sense)but was reluctant because he thought that the society then was not matured enough to accept an inter-caste, inter-religion marriage, love marriage. He was not scared for himself or her, but for her younger sister and brother and his own sisters. They had mutually decided not to blabber about their relationship and with time she finished her MBBS and moved to Delhi for pursuing MD and he stayed back in the same college. They did not meet each other for about 10 yrs, while she was in Delhi. Both of them had denied all alliances proposed by their parents.

Nobody ever knew that they were willing to marry, but only with each other, only after all their siblings were settled in their lives…Today was the day when they would be declared man and wife for ever…he smiled.

28th March 1983: Then happened a fateful accident, which forced him to reveal his relationship with her. He was traveling with his younger brothers, when their car met with a massive accident near Delhi, they somehow managed to drive upto a hospital in Delhi. One of his brothers was seriously injured, though he had administered First Aid, he would need help and he could only think of her. He gave his youngest brother an address and asked him to give his reference.
It was 1.30 am when a man, stained with blood, rang the door-bell, she opened the door with her mother beside her. As soon as she heard his name, she took her coat, her medical kit and ID and rushed to the hospital(without sparing a thought to verify the information, his name was enough, such is their understanding), by morning his elder brother and father were in the hospital, situation was fine and everybody knew about her…and to his surprise were more than happy to accept her as their daughter-in-law. Even her mother was elated because her daughter who was around 35yrs now had almost refused to marry, was now game for marriage.

Even now at their 25th marriage anniversary they didn’t feel the need to wish each other. They virtually don’t interact with each other for days now, but they know each other so well that there is no room for words…I guess sometimes words may not convey the message, which silence does.

This post may sound fiction but it’s a true story and not an excerpt from the next script of Karan Johar or the Chopras. There is a lot more to this love story, which just can’t be summarized into this one post. All I can say is, if even after 10 yrs of non-contact you think of only one person in times of trouble and trust only person then its love. If you can rush from your home in chappals at 1.30 am on hearing somebodies name even after 10 yrs then its truly and surely pure love…..

Dedicated to the loveliest couple I have ever met and am sure will ever meet.

PRAYAS

As a part of the curriculum of a course I had to work for an NGO for about 10 days. I spent days searching for one in my vicinity and finally found one…Its known as Prayas. It deals with the education of underprivileged children and adult women. Initially when I applied, I just had my certificate in mind, and saw my convenience only. I took up the work of teaching rather than administrative work because the school was closer to my home as compared to the administrative office. I admit that I had been really selfish…Since it was my first day, I was give the nursery and KG classes to deal with…I thought to myself ‘great, now I’ll have to teach ABC…what a wonderful thing to do after a post-graduation in biotechnology, but…
When I entered the class…I was greeted by 54 innocent voices in chorus. I looked at their faces, smiling and joyous to see a new ‘madam’, as they put it. Initially I really didn’t know what to do and how to handle them, as they are a bunch (a rather big one) of boisterous kids…but gradually with the help of a more experienced colleague I managed to gather my energies. As the day progressed I felt a lot better as things were going just about fine…till a new student was sent to the class, his mother came along with him…His name is Sahil, and is really cute n chubby but he is a champion when it comes to crying…the moment his mother walked out of the class-room he started his orchestra. My colleague tried to console him and engage him in some talks but he kept crying finally after lot of hard work we had to call his mother and allow her to sit in the class...The moment she walked out of the class the boy would start off almost instantaneously…what scared my colleague more was that another girl named Nitya, who also has won the reputation of being the most cranky child in the batch, who surprisingly was in very cheerful mood today, shouldn’t start off…but she didn’t and trust me she is a delight to watch the moment she comes down to reciting nursery rhymes…
Then there was a trio of girls who just did want to sit separately and somehow struggled to sit on the bench meant for two only…I could only catch the names of two of them Damini (she has constant smirk on her face and is the most mischievous student) and Kusum…it was a task to get them to do any work…but they are really cute and to think that they live in such difficult circumstances (I have been to a slum and know the conditions there, so I know) and still manage to keep that captivating smile on their faces its great…
One thing that was common to all students was their zeal to learn, almost all of them performed their assigned class work and made sure we saw it. Even when we had to assign their home-works (long forgotten word for me), we didn’t give them much, but they kept on saying that they wanted to do more. Another thing that was very remarkable was that there was so much of concern for the others in the class also…if any student was not listening to what we were saying or teaching the other would nudge him/her and make sure that they listen…
But the highlight was Sahil…my hands are still aching…as I had to actually console him by carrying him around the entire class-room, showing him the different colorful charts, drawings etc…so that he stops beating the orchestra…but all this was only short-term, he would start off every 10 min and his mother had to sit their through-out the day…only a mother can do that for her child’s future…hats off to her…

On day 2: I entered the class and heard Sahil crying again, he came running to me in the hope that I would allow his mother to sit in the class…which I didn’t (felt bad, but couldn’t help it, he has to learn) but I allowed his mother to sit outside the class so that he could get a glimpse of her whenever he wanted. I made two new friends Disha and Anurag, both of them too sincere and too cute. By the end of the day Sahil had learnt to recognize the alphabet ‘A’ and the number ‘1’.

On day 3: I was just outside the school when I saw Sahil and his mother…we were 5 min early so I took him for a ride on my scooty. Then we went to the class…his mother seated outside the class. My colleague began with checking their Home-Work and I started giving them Class-Work for the day…I had just finished when a girl came to me with a blank notebook, she had not written anything…she said she can’t write…I took her and Sahil to the last bench and made them hold a pencil. It took me 15 min to get them to hold the pencils correctly and position the book correctly…now comes the real task…to teach them how to write the alphabet ‘A’…It took a cool 30 min before they got it perfectly…and Sahil took 40 min because half the time he was looking for his mother…but thank God he didn’t cry…I felt it was some achievement…At the end of the day Damini asked me “Madam aap kal bhi aoge na?” , I just smiled…

I felt really good…The in-charge asked me whether I would like to teach higher classes after he came to know that I was a post-graduate… and I declined…now when I come back home I really miss the kids and look forward to meeting them the next day…

I feel honored to be associated with an organization like this…To eradicate illiteracy, yeh hai meri taraf se ek chota sa prayas……

Eclipse…the mythological aspect

Just came across a text stating the mythology behind this celestial phenomenon. According to this text…the story of solar eclipse stems from what is popularly known as Samudra Manthan. It is said that at the time of Samudra Manthan when the sweet tasting nectar of immortality came out, there was a huge tug-of-war among the Devtas and the Asuras as to who will drink the Amrit, then the devtas approached Lord Vishnu who disguised as a damsel known as Mohini. As accomplished she was, Mohini kept the asuras enchanted with her beauty and poured the amrit only to the devtas…but two of the asuras Rahu and Ketu managed to sneak in-between the devtas and sipped the amrit but Surya Dev and Chandra Dev, because of his luminous nature were able to the spot them and Lord Vishnu acted soon and killed the asuras with his chakra but by that time the amrit had already reached their throat, so their heads became immortal, and so to seek revenge Rahu and Ketu occasionally swallow the sun and moon and the heavenly bodies then travel through the throat to finally appear again.

Strange, but true this is what our mythology states. Wonder how did people manage to think something as insane as that…Thank God for Science and scientist or else even we would trust such preposterous stories.

HEY RAM
Know if he could; the pain
his beloved motherland is in,
how grateful the Mahatma would be
to the bullet which silenced him.

Satyagriha; he fought the British with
has overrun the nation like plague,
a razor in the hands of monkeys
he would think; did he give.

Cacophony of last laugh of monsters,
cast, creed, inequalities, poverty& violence;
he fought all his life; would
make him fast everyday; unto death

Seeing spottless khadi clothing unclear souls;
wheel would cry& spindle shiver,
without an assassin he would fall
everyday& every night- Hey Ram.

My father wrote this poem about 15 years back...I read it today.

Love you papa...one day I will make sure that you pick up that pen again for writing such stuff other than just signing and reviewing official files...

REASON TO LIVE IN 7 LINES

Chalte hue, payega tu manzil, Gum se na darr, Gum se hi, hogi khushi hasil.Honge poore tere armaan.

Kehti hai, bahtey samay ki dhaar, jeet hogi, teri ek din, khud se na aise haar.Hongi mushkilen bhi aasan.

Aata hai, raat kay baad hi din,koi nahi aaj tera, duniyan main kal lekin,tere kadmoo pe hoga jahan,

Aankhon main rok le,tu ye aansuoon ka tufaan.leti hai zindaganihar kadam pe ek imtihaan.

This is not something that I have written...but this had to be on my blog...this is the title song of a television series which used to come about a decade back...n I still remember it so clearly its just so inspiring...I don't know who the lyricist is but I think in these 7 lines he managed to summarize life n hats off to him for this....

A Few Moist Eyes and a Bleeding Heart

One can never understand the importance of anything till there is a dearth of it. Similar is the case with human beings…one can never know how special the person is till the tide of time takes the person away from you. I experienced this feeling yet again ofcourse for a new set of people…but the feeling remains just the same.

I never knew that in this very short second innings of mine in Mumbai I had made such lovely friends, till the day we had our final lunch together (at Khushboo’s favorite food joint)…I don’t know whether you all noticed or not but that day we hardly spoke n were most formal with each other, also we didn’t click any pics…we used to click pics at DP’s, college cafeteria, classrooms…that was like our favorite pass-time whenever we were together but that day the whole atmosphere was so different…I never thought that a person as practical as Khushboo could ever drop a tear because one of us was going from Mumbai…Khushboo I might have never said it to you but I really admired you for one reason that you were really honest each time and miles away from the word ‘hypocrisy’…Did you know that it was because of you that I completed like one fourth of my syllabus...because whenever you asked me a question I was compelled to look at the notes, which I otherwise wouldn’t have bothered to read till the D-date…You were probably my first companion in college…when I came to know that we were in the same working group…I had kind of mixed feelings…but slowly as we went ahead with our assignments I really felt happy and more than that honored to be in the same working group as you, for the only reason that you put so much of hard work in every task…n inspire the others also…forget about the people who didn’t get inspired…they were hopeless cases (you know whom I’m talking about don’t you? )…but sweety, that day those tears….

Then for two the lovely people, one who can be the brand ambassador for laughter therapy n a perfect substitute for Baba Ramdev and the other who is the brand ambassador of Hide n Seek and Ruffles Lays…do I need to name the two of you??? These two girls brought the smile back on my face when I thought I had just given up smiling…they got the humor out of me…they made me feel special…I owe a lot to them…much more than what meets the eye n it can’t be expressed in just by petty words…The two of them are diametrically opposite…n I have experienced the best and the worst of both the personalities…but one thing both of them have in common, is that both of them are extremely stubborn (n not to forget allergic to cold stuff) n will never listen to me, be it having roadside stuff or the most unhygienic juices in the world…they will never listen to me whenever I ask them to refrain from such stuffs n almost always land up with a sour throat or an upset stomach…another trait that is common is that both of them derive immense pleasure in what ever sets my eyes to water…be it surprising me on the b’days in the most bizarre but gratifying way…or crafting the worlds most special gifts…or coming to see me off at the airport at 8 in the morning (its not easy, considering traveling time in Mumbai)….they did it all…but sweeties those tears…

Finally, my friends from School Shilpi, Smita and Sneha…you guys are kind of immune to my moving in and out of Mumbai...but still Shilpi you need to grow up in every which way…Shilpi you are one of the most innocent people I have come across and the best thing about you is that time didn’t rob you off that innocence…you made me feel mature…but that whimper on the phone that day….

Those tears didn’t set my eyes to water…but each drop of tear was like a spike…they pierced my heart…I never have moist eyes whenever I leave a place but always a bleeding heart…but guys there is one thing I tell all my friends and am sharing it with you all also…

There are many facets to friendship, the most important of them being a string that tethers the two individuals. To me the string should be very elastic in nature to survive the strain of spatial distances, every other facet just falls in place if this string is elastic enough…for me the friendship begins when a person’s physical presence in my routine diminishes or evaporates. So, I never I like to shed tears at a person’s departure as I know my friendship is to begin now…it’s the very important for the metamorphosis of a person from being an acquaintance to a friend…

So, I hope the string of our friendship is elastic enough to endure this strain of spatial distance…